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Men and women have reciprocally different natures. In order to nurture our relationships and lead more fulfilling lives, we must start to appreciate our differences and curb our expectations from one another to act and feel the way they do.
Here are the top things that husbands wish their wives knew:
1. Your Words Can Hurt Us Real Bad:
Just as an average man is physically stronger than the average woman, a woman is emotionally stronger than a man. She can easily overpower him by nagging, complaining, making him feel insufficient and not a real man. Furthermore, she can even do this without using words, just by looking, the expression on his face, the shrill and distressed tone of his voice and etc.
She’s a master of nonverbal communication. She remembers his past mistakes and her past disappointments much better than he does. Her words can pierce a man’s heart and mentally destroy him over time. Note that home is a shelter, not a battlefield – neither physical nor emotional.
2. Respect Him In Public
Show respect. Don’t be submissive, but put your concerns in the framework of respect. Show respect by not doubting his decisions and judgment. Trust his capability, let him learn from his mistakes and don’t rub it in. It is incumbent to acknowledge that men have fragile egos just as women are generally insecure about their bodies.
Never ever make a joke or sarcastic comment about him in public just as you would loathe being commented on gaining a few pounds in public. Conversely speaking, if a wife respects her man, the man feels like he can take on the world. Stroke your man’s self-esteem by appreciating him and you will reap the benefits in the form of a more patient, jubilant and tender gentleman.
3. He Is Not An ATM
If you recently married, chances are your man is young and in the starting stages of his career, striving to make an impact. His income is nowhere comparable to your father’s, who is probably at the peak of his career. You are no longer daddy’s pampered little princess. Your man is not an ATM so be wise with your spending. Grow up, be a woman and get yourself a job to share finances equally.
If you or your husband do not wish for you to work, or it is not possible for any other reason, have enough decency to control cashing out on the latest collections from Sapphire or Bareeze, etc. It may also help to change your outlook on sales. You are not saving 25%, but you are spending 75% extra on an item you don’t really need. Recycle and re-use stuff. Dine in more and treasure the cheap thrills.
4. Be Good In Bedroom Relationship
Physical intimacy is important. It is a direct equivalent to your need for a sympathetic ear and validation through conversation. You can fulfill your need with your family, friends & partner. In contrast, men can fulfill this need ONLY through you. Sex empowers men. Continual sexual rejection is the most painful, demoralizing factor in the relationship.
Note that this is not about objectifying you, otherwise the brutal truth is that it is way cheaper to fulfill this need in hotel rooms through unlawful means. With the person who your husband loves and cherishes, it is simply way richer and fulfilling on an emotional, intellectual and even spiritual level. It may also be interesting to note that if the bedroom relations are good, most faults of the wife outside the bedroom are ignored.
5. Give Equal Importance To His Parents As You Do To Yours
If his mom’s or relatives’ opinions nag you, you are welcome to vent with your husband occasionally but don’t fire up when he does the same. Enough with the “tumhare ghar walay” and “mere ghar walay”! You are ONE for God’s sake! Please appreciate that it’s tough to maintain a balance between our mother and you as you both are equally important to us.
6. Never Challenge His Patience Through Your Mood Swings
It is natural to sometimes dislike and even be offended by your partner’s words and actions. Instead of playing manipulative games and having crazy mood swings, PLEASE TELL THEM WHAT IS WRONG! They would also really appreciate if you addressed the matter at hand rather than dig out memories from the past.
7. It Is Not Okay To Discuss His Bad Habits With Anyone
It is never okay to trash talk about your man with ANYONE! His bad habits are yours to endure just like his good ones are yours to cherish, not your parents or your friends. When they trust you with our feelings, they are for you alone. It is not okay to share them with anyone.
8. Your Smile Is Important To Us!
No matter how bad their day goes, your smile fills their heart with joy. Please smile more!
“ when men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom ”
― John Gray, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus