Ours is a society where marriage is considered sacred. A sacred relation between two people, every man, and woman on the outlook of a match made in heaven. Families, especially if they have daughters, start looking for the ‘perfect rishta’, one that would come good for their daughters in the long run. The search of the perfect groom, who seldom exists.
For the guy, who is to be the groom, the journey of marriage is not as sweet as it seems, especially if he does not belong to a very well-off family and has a running and well-established business. For the groom, marriage then becomes a struggle which he has to face. The set criteria and demand of the girl’s family is at times, more than what the groom can sport.
First and foremost, every family in Pakistan these days demands the groom to be financially secure. No family wants to send their daughter to a house where the guy is only making ends meet and/or living hand to mouth. Financially secure here mean a couple of things; i.e – for the groom to have a good (well-paid) job, a house which is not rented and at least one car, if not more.
In Pakistan, with the mass unemployment and hysterically less paid jobs, the guy can either think about feeding him and his family or bringing a new family member in, who completely depends on you, that too with a thousand demands from the girl’s family.
In the case of love marriages, couples often find themselves at the wrong end of the sword. With countless promises, the duo makes to each other during the time they are in a relationship when their families find out, the measures get rather strict, and the demands increase. Well educated and belonging to a good family does not remain enough then. All of a sudden, the families need the groom to be absolutely perfect for their daughters, things they would subtly let pass if the marriage was arranged.
In the 21st century, nothing matters, except financial security. Getting married is like a test if you are not rich – you’re either going to pass or fail, it is a test that men just cannot cheat on. Society’s demands, different pressures, and expectations make marriage an extremely bitter-sweet experience for the groom – instead of looking for a well-established son-in-law, maybe grooms should be given enough room and leverage to make something of themselves in the long run.