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I would be lying if I tell you people say that I am stubborn. No one says that to anyone’s face anymore but yes they do say it behind my back. It’s funny how you start to believe whatever you are told by people around you. For some time I actually ended up believing them. Maybe I was all the things which other people told me.
Here’s what I have been told. I am Stubborn. Impractical. Bossy. Difficult to handle Now lets for a moment forget for a moment that I am a girl and imagine that I was I guy what would I be then. Determined. Strong willed. Brave Cheetah hai apna (I am assuming that’s what guys say to each other on the account that my brother says that) I have never in my entire life seen any lady friend saying to her fellow friend that “oh you are really smart” or “you are so learned” or “you are so determined or strong”. Being a woman the compliments I hear around me are “you look pretty”. “Your clothes look pretty”. “Your shoes look pretty”. “Your face looks pretty” and that is it.
Let me announce this to the world today. I did not decide how my face looks. God created it. I cannot change in or improve it because it’s not my doing. I look like this because my mother and father look like this and because the genetic material they passed me. Complimenting someone on their face is like complimenting their DNA which by the way is also not in their control. It’s like commanding nature on what a wonderful job it did.
Complimenting on clothes, you are complimenting the designer or the tailor who made it or silkworm who cocooned itself to the perfection or the farmer who produced the perfect puffs cotton used in the cloth. Complimenting shoes is complimenting the craftsmanship of the cobbler or in today’s time efficiency of a factories machine. You can compliment a woman’s taste I will give you that but compliment someones face is downright offensive it’s worse than no praise. If you really want to compliment me compliment my brain, my conduct or my personality. Saying someone is pretty is like saying let me set aside your honesty, integrity, truthfulness and all the wonderful aspects of your personality and comment how nature made your face symmetrical.
There is no gender discrimination or segregation in any language of the world. The word “wise” is used for a person with wisdom, the word “brave” is used for a person with courage. Sadly, after 20 years of life, I know that a woman is a bossy while a man is a leader. A woman is impractical, while a man is a visionary.
I could blame this dilemma all on men but then I would be lying again. It’s not their fault entirely. A society is made up of men and woman alike. We are as much part of the society as they are and therefore must share the blame too. We live in a society where gender roles shape our entire life. From the minute we are born we are either warped in a blue blanket or a pink blanket. We teach our men to be tough beyond their limits and our women to be weak beyond theirs. Exceptions do exist but these exceptions are labeled. Every theory needs proof and experimentation let me elaborate this with a small example.
EVERY NAMES OR Situation IN THIS PLAY IS A WORK OF PURE FICTION. ANY RESEMBLANCE TO CHARACTER LIVING OR DEAD IS PURELY FICTITIOUS.
PLAY: UNDYING NEED TO CONVINCE
SCENE: 1, ACT 1
Curtains moving, drum roll in the back ground
Once upon a time in a far away land Ali, Amina and Ahmed were sitting in a tree. Ali said he liked yellow apples. Ahmed said he liked green apples. Amina said she liked red apples and then all hell broke loose. For the next 24 hours the two gentlemen explained Amina how fundamentally wrong she was. To make matters worse Amina defended her love for red apples. Ali and Ahmed unable to comprehend Amina’s love for red apple continued to convince her of her disgusting taste preference. In the end, Amina puts her foot down and announces that she still loves red apples. Ali and Ahmed shake their heads is dismay as well as the audience and label Amina as “stubborn”.
Moral: Women are fickle minded and their opinions are made through thin air, now imagine the above narrative just replace the word “Amina” with “Amir”, “dismay” with “admiration” and “stubborn” with “will-full” or “determined” and the moral will change itself into something like “stay strong” or “hold your ground”.