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“I became a writer so that the voices inside my head would become an acceptable occurrence” – JANAE MITCHELL.
Did you ever feel overwhelmed by the uncontrollable voices in your head that never surcease to quiet down? A voice that I hear in my head, telling me what to do. I cannot differentiate between real and unreal. Reality is blurred and my head can become a living hell or pathway to heaven. I don’t actually hear the voice with my ears, like someone with schizophrenia or another mental illness. This is called an auditory hallucination.
Like when we are seven or eight and still believe in the boogeyman. Or you are not sure if you are all alone in a darker room or worry about hanging your feet over the edge of the bed because there’s a voice inside your head telling you to be afraid! Despite the fact that having your parents nearby you. You are letting the voice take over.
When you are fourteen, difficult and confused, sitting in an examination hall thinking that what will you do if there was an unpredictable question. Although having your preparation 110%, you are perpetually thinking that you will definitely forget everything as you go through the paper. You don’t think if it’s worth it or not. You are letting the voice take over.
When you’re sixteen rebellious and still ignorant, all your friends are going out but you’re grounded. There’s a voice at the back of your mind telling you it’s ok, you’re not getting any younger. You sneak out when your parents have gone to bed. You don’t think if it’s worth it or not. You’re letting the voice take over. Your passion is to live your life but you are still thinking that what will people say? What will my family and society say? You’re taking the voice over! It’s unfortunate that we stay in a society whereby a real job includes professions like doctor, lawyer, engineers.
When it’s almost midnight and you’re alone in your garden enjoying coffee with your favorite novel, not believing in the cliché made-up villain. But scared of every little thing nearby you. There’s a voice at the back of your head telling you to be afraid. You’re letting the voice take over. When you are 29 and you think you have taken your life under your control but one little detail falls through. Like the job failure, your relationship curdle or your bill left overdue, then there’s a voice at the back of your mind telling you, your life is the mess. Give up! Leave it! You’re letting the voice take over.
When you are thirty-four and still getting the hang of parenting, your children are your life. You come back from your work and get to know that there is a serious injury at your younger son’s feet, there’s is a voice at the back of your head telling you that you have done a bad job. You’re letting the voice take over.
When you’re 53, and your son doesn’t want to be a businessman but a photographer. You think where you went wrong, but the truth is, he didn’t want to live your dreams. There’s a voice at the back of your mind telling you to be angry because you know what’s right for him. You are letting the voice take over.
And yes! Now finally when you’re 80 with a roof still above your head, walls that you have proudly filled with pictures of your family looks amazingly beautiful. You’ve ditched your high heels and fashionable clothes because now comfort comes first and the voices in your head? Well, you don’t hear them anymore, because you now realize they should never have let you doubt yourself because you’ve made too many bad decisions to still be the devil’s advocate.
I just want to say that never be the devil’s advocate. Be positive! And never let anyone live your dream. You are so precious and so is your life and dreams. Recognize ‘the voice’ and don’t let it take over.