The toxic rishta culture persists in Pakistan. It is a common practice to exhibit girls in front of women who are completely unknown to them and are able to throw any piece of unbound judgment at her face unapologetically. Taking to Twitter, a number of girls shared their traumatizing and toxic rishta experiences.
Both men and women are judged on their suitability as spouses based on narrow criteria of looks, wealth, and perceived attitudes. Criteria that diminish their humanity and serve to perpetuate gender roles as traditional in our culture.
As part of the horrors, the man’s family chose an appropriate woman to join their family in a chivalrous act. The majority of families do not even bother to ask for the woman’s consent beforehand. The girls’ educational and future prospects, pictures, and in some cases, their ethnicity, skin color, and weight are all circulated without their consent.
It is so extreme that when women are subjected to matchmaking, they are often unsolicitedly advised to whiten their skin tones. Aside from this, they’re told expressly that they’re not good enough. However, this only represents the tip of the iceberg. Be it the matchmaker or the potential groom’s family, they nitpick on irrelevant details. From the texture of the girl’s hair to the way she sits or walks.
Nevertheless, these young women are here to say they’ve had enough. It is certainly a toxic and unhealthy exercise. The following girl expressed her hate for the rishta culture, leading to many more girls opening up about their horrid experiences. Having shared her own personal experience with the rishta aunties, this girl shared how it intensified her hate for the toxic rishta culture.
Women pour in their own such experiences
What an absolute shame! This is not only humiliating to women who are being subjected to it but it also suggests that the outdated and racist perspective of beauty within the rishta culture trumps everything.
The famous quote from the one and only Sima Taparia from Indian Matchmaking, “Tall, slim, trim!” sums up the rishta culture. Speaking of Indian Matchmaking, the entire series highlights the snake pit of patriarchy. While watching the show, we are constantly fed with the idea of how crucial it is for young women to be ‘adjusting’, ‘compromising’, and ‘flexible’.
It may be recalled that Saba Qamar lately raised her voice on the ‘traditional rishta culture’ of our society. In a video i.e. is essentially a monologue about fat-shaming, classism, colorism, and women’s rights, Saba emphasized how society treats women unfairly.
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