Marriage nowadays is nothing more than a gamble.
If it works out, you win. If it doesn’t, you lose everything. And yet, right at the stroke of 12 a.m., as a girl reaches her 18th birthday, her parents begin searching for the right person for her.
Why can girls not go to other people’s weddings to celebrate? All it seems is like is yet another task, yet another day to dodge ‘the’ question. The question that comes out of the aimless people we call aunties, ‘what are you doing nowadays, beta?’
In a Pakistani society, a college going girl doesn’t have to stress as much about her school grades as much as she has to about what awaits her at home. Because there’s always an aunty waiting to get her hitched, and my God, the parents? Can’t wait to get rid of the girl.
I ask all girls, all parents, all people- why can’t you let the girl fly? Why are you so adamant on keeping her grounded, so much so that she clips off her wings herself and forcefully enters the trap of marriage.
Believe me or not, we can be CEOs, #1 cricketers, teachers, pilots, bakers, astronauts and anything and everything your sons can be. Why is it that you say ‘it’s not safe’ when a girl wants to sit at a dhabba but you let your boys roam the streets on motorbikes with their friends even after midnight?
If a girl can’t be safe, how can a guy be safe? Why do we impose these sexist barriers?
If you think your son is strong, well maybe it’s because you willingly pay for his cricket/football training to make sure he stays fit. And all that money you’re saving up for your daughter’s wedding? Be rational and let her go reach the stars.
My dad always says marriage is a gamble. Why is society so persistent on putting girls through it? Why is all the pressure on the female? Why can’t she be well settled without a man? Let her fly, let her go above and beyond, let her get that degree, that job, that car, that house.
Let her run the business, let her work from home, let her deal with males. Let her win.
Parents- stop doing to your kids what your parents did to you.
Children- stop agreeing with everything your parents say. If you don’t want to get married, go and live your life. Study, work, travel.
Girls- you are not a commodity. Don’t sit there, ready to be sold to a rich household in Defence. Go out. Explore. Find your own self. You are much more than just a helpless girl. Want master’s degree? Go get it. Want job? Go get it. Don’t stop yourself.
Marriage isn’t an achievement.
It’s a huge, beautiful, mesmerizing bond between two people. But it isn’t where you stop. It’s where you start. So before you say yes to whatever your parents are forcing upon you, remember God is giving you a choice. Don’t waste it.