There’s no denying the fact that people in Pakistan are obsessed with looking good. Everyone wants to look perfect on a daily basis, not only in real lives but also on their Facebook profiles and other social media accounts. If someone who follows us on Instagram, actually meets us in real life, he might not even recognize us! That’s how good we are at faking our looks and we are pretty much aware of all the flattering and unflattering camera angles. It’s nothing to be proud of and we need to change our mindsets but we also need to accept that this narcissistic approach is not going to take us anywhere but it is also not going anywhere, anytime soon.
Now imagine dealing with a society like this with no hair on your head! You are going bald and all of your friends are busy following the latest hairstyle trends. There’s Priyanka Chopra flaunting her thick and long hair on our national television and you are hiding your bald patches under a hat. Life’s so unfair, isn’t it? Well, as if nature itself wasn’t cruel enough towards you, people around you won’t also forgive you easily for being bald. You’ll get the harshest of taunts even from your loved ones; be it your family or your friends, they think it is funny when it’s actually not. You can’t help but accept the fact that this is how they express their love towards you and whatever they are saying, it’s just for fun.
So here are a few things only Pakistani bald people get to hear pretty often.
1. Aj To Tind Bari Chamak Rahi Hai:
Source: CollegeTimes.com
As soon as you reach work, your irritating co-worker (who god knows why is so excited before 9 am) will greet you with a pat on your head. You literally want to kick this person so hard that he thinks twice before talking to you ever again, but you can’t.
2. Tum Shampoo Lagatey Ho?
Source: Reddit
“Nahi bhai, mai nahata bhi nahi. Koi problem hai?” People are so curious about your bathing habits that they’ll actually forget that these questions are very personal.
3. Tum Muu Kahan Tak Dhotey Ho?
Can you please NOT!!
Source: A cloche-main
Because there’s no visible hairline, people think it is their right to ask such stupid questions.
4. Transplant Kara Lo:
Source: PopKey
This is a never ending advice. You go to work, a family function, to a relative or to meet a friend, whether you want it or not, this advice is inevitable!
5. Birthday Per Tumhaein Kangi Gift Krengay:
Source: Tumblr
They might not even remember when your birthday is but throughout the year they’ll wait for it to gift you a kangi!
6. Ganju Patel, Teri Khopri Main Taile:
Source: The Deal
Just like kids grow up listening to nursery rhymes, bald people get to hear this so much that they know this monstrosity by heart.
7. Ab Shaadi Kesay Hogi Tumhari?
Source: Hair Care
So the biggest goal of everyone’s life here is to get married. Your academics, your career, none of it matters. And if you are bald, then my dear, people will almost make you believe that you’ll probably die alone craving for companionship. There would be no one to run fingers through your hair because… YOU HAVE NO HAIR!
8. Is Maidaan Per To Cricket Khelsaktey Hain?
Source: BuzzFeed
They might even bring their gears, Pakistanis are very serious about cricket! Don’t take this comment lightly.
9. Dour Se Dekha To Anday Ubal Rahay Thay, Qareeb Ja Ke Dekha To Ganjay Uchal Rahay Thay:
Source: RolePlayGateway
No matter how tired you are of hearing it, this statement is not leaving you until you’re dead.
10. Ye Hawaien Zulfo Main Teri Gungunayeinnnn!
Source: Hair Care
Abhishek Bachann and his movies might be flop but this song from one of his movies is a hit among people who want to taunt people with no hair.
The world thinks bald people are sexy but, unfortunately, in Pakistan facial hair becomes a dire necessity to compensate the lack of hair on your head. And if you are, God forbid, also not lucky in that department, then sir, salam hai aapko aur apki himmat ko!
If you have anything else to add to this list then let us know with your comments.
