Where journalists and analysts are worried about the future of the USA and the rest of the world after 11/9, where the educated people have loaded their social media accounts with criticism on Donald Trump, and the news channels bashing after the defeat of Hillary, my only problem is the compilation of the list of things I am going to send to my only friend in the US. They have just informed me that they are planning to come back because being a Pakistani Muslim, the conditions are going to be the worst for them. However, as I told you all before my only concern is that list of things, so here I go. (Hey, guys! You could help me also if I forget something)
1. Bring Out All The Flags Of USA You Bought In The Love Of Hillary
Being a patriotic desi I know very well about the yahoodi sazish in Pakistan and for the protests we do every week, I need the flags which we can burn.
Actually, these are expensive here bro!
2. All Your Levis T-Shirts And Denim Jeans
It’s all about the luck dude!
3. And All Your Utensils, Including Newly Bought Cutlery Set
This one is added by mama. You know how much she is worried about the jehez ka saman of your sister.
4. The Patli Pin Wala Charger
Don’t underestimate the power of Nokia 1100. Unfortunately, phupho stole mine. So, please!
5. The Tissue Papers
No, not at all! I am not asking for it to wipe off your tears. Our toilet paper roll is near to an end. Yours would remain useless there. Bring it too, dear. Angrezon ka mulk choro to sb choro, hosake to furniture bhi utha lao!
6. Don’t Forget The Chocolates This Time!
Mars, Twix, Kisses (not from Trump!), Snickers, Milky Way, KitKat, Galaxy and…
7. And All Your Bed-Sheets+ Cushion Covers+ Beauty Products+ Shaving Cream…
I was planning to change the whole setting of my room and luckily Trump won! Oh, yes! pillow too, dear. I have listened to my mom’s friend that Amreeka walon k haan takiye bare khaas hote hain, and the rest of the things are for your lovely bhabhi yaar!
I would pay the extra luggage charges for all the stuff I am asking for, but please don’t you dare forget a thing!!